Sunday, October 3, 2010

The Seeds of Doubt

Today, over on WD, there was a strange verbal war taking place. Linton and Nee were debating psychobabble. (Okay, it was a bit more complicated than that, but the subject matter of their disagreement is not what this blog is about.) It arose from a nonsensical post made by an oddball we call Yoga Guru. Long story short, we all felt this guy would be an ideal candidate for the Nut Hut.


Martin came up with an idea. He posted to the discussion, suggesting that we'd all been scammed. He wondered if Yoga Guru might be a shrink himself, fluent in English, conducting some kind of case study involving message board participants. If this was the case, we’d all end up looking pretty stupid.


This might sound preposterous, but the possibility, however remote, exists. And though few will admit to it, I believe now that the idea has been suggested, more than a few will wonder. That's human nature. Stand on a busy streetcorner and look skyward for a few minutes. You'll see. Before long, several people will be looking up, wondering what you see.


A close friend of my mother's has been married for maybe fifty years now. Her husband adores her. They have five adult children and at least as many grandchildren. For years, however, she found it impossible to believe he really loved her because she had been pregnant when they got married. They were both teenagers and their mothers insisted they get married. She believed he was only there because he’d been forced to be with her. It troubled her to such an extent that she was seeing a psychiatrist for years. 


Someone close to me was also profoundly affected by the seeds of doubt. She fell in love with a man who gave her every indication that he felt the same way. A romantic rival, however, told her he was just using her to advance his career. The rival, as you might guess, was someone this woman neither liked nor trusted, but that suggestion was compounded by the fact that even though the man insisted he couldn't give her what she wanted, he certainly acted like a man in love. She began to wonder. If he didn't love her, where was this coming from? Was it all about his career? Instead of feeling good about such a deep friendship, it slowly began to have the reverse effect.


I write about such relationship issues. My female characters almost always have trust issues. Lynne in Chasing the Wind had been through two failed relationships when she fell in love with Connor. Chloe in Same Time, Tomorrow was abandoned by her father at age seven. 


The seeds of doubt, left unchecked, can grow like a cancer, deadly, destructive.... 



2 comments:

  1. That is so true. Probably my entire childhood was ruined by a seed of doubt like that

    ReplyDelete

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