Wednesday, May 25, 2011

What the (Bleep) Was He Thinking?

A recap of the past couple of weeks: actor and former California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger and his wife of twenty-five years, television journalist Maria Shriver, announced they were separating. Shortly thereafter, a cause for the split was revealed: Arnold had fathered a child with a member of his household staff. At that point, the identity of the woman was not revealed. That surfaced a few days later. Since that revelation, many stories about her have been circulated...and Mildred Baena has retained an attorney to deal with unflattering things that have been said and written about her.

Unflattering? were dancing the horizontal tango with another woman's husband, honey. You got knocked up in a time when that sort of thing is preventable (except on soap operas).  Did you expect accolades? I'm betting you've been called a lot of unflattering things by a lot of people you don't even know about. Get used to it. Adulterers don't get a lot of praise. Be thankful they don't get stoned in this country.

Some of the unflattering things that have been said or written: that she was the aggressor, that she pursued him (to be fair, from what I've read about ol' Arnold, he probably wasn't all that hard to get). It's been reported that when Mrs. Schwarzenegger wasn't home, Ms. Mistress liked to help herself to Maria's clothes and jewelry. (I find this one hard to believe because I doubt the Other Woman could squeeze herself into the Wife's clothing.) 

Rumor has it the Other Woman saw herself as "gorgeous" and wanted all the luxuries she felt were her due. Gorgeous? Okay...not only was her judgment impaired, but her eyesight is also  in question. I'm not saying she should be doing ads for Alpo--there's a chasm of difference between "not beautiful" and "butt ugly"--but she's far from gorgeous.

So if it wasn't about physical appearance, what was it that Arnold saw in her? Only he knows the answer to that question. The rest of us can only guess. Was it feeding his ego? He has an attractive, intelligent, accomplished wife--one who has her own career, her own interests. Along comes a woman who probably worshipped at his altar, made him the center of her attention. That's an aphrodisiac. Feed his ego, and he'll follow you into the sack.

It's been said that the Mistress was threatening to go public because she wanted more than she's been getting from Arnold. She wants what the Wife has. She wants all she feels is her due as the mother of his child. Note to Mistress: Wife has four children with him. Don't act like you've borne the heir to a throne.

Note to Arnold: did you really think you could keep it a secret forever? Come on--the Other Woman almost always starts making demands. If they're not met, she will make sure your Wife finds out what a swine you are...and it will cost you big, one way or another.

Note to Maria: take his balls home in a doggie bag. And feed them to your dog. If you don't have  a dog, buy one. Make Arnold pay for it.



  1. Oh, what a blog! We need a laughing avatar!

    Excellent points, Norma, and I absolutely love your final lines!

    Somewhere, Arnold feels himself squirm for a reason he can't quite understand....

  2. I don't know why celebrities think they can get away with it without any consequences. Of course, Arnold has the double whammy of celebrity and politician going for his ego.

  3. Honestly, I think Ms. Mistress had this planned all along.

  4. I love this blog! I was laughing about the fact that Maria should take Arnold's balls in a doggie bag and give them to the dog...Love that! You know, he's just another loser who got caught. Like Hugh Grant....getting caught with a less than gorgeous hooker...I don't get it. They can have anyone they want, but they pick the homely ones...

    Excellent job! And, love the pics.

  5. Ha! How about feeding the contents of that doggy bag to the Mistress?!

  6. I'm not condoning what Other Woman did as she was obviously aware that he was married, but in fairness, he was the one who was married and chose to break his marriage vows. Of course people are going to say bad things about both of them but I don't blame her for being upset about some of it - why should the Other Woman get all the scorn?

  7. Is there a governor who HASN'T messed around on his or her spouse?


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