Friday, July 29, 2011

A Rude, Very Rude, Awakening!

I'm getting old. How can that be?
Like my parents, I've aged slowly. Very slowly. When I was ten, I won a piggy bank at the rodeo because a guy couldn't guess my age. In my thirties and forties, I was carded when I ordered drinks. Even last year, I was mistaken for Collin's wife/girlfriend/sister--and Collin, at 32, doesn't look his age, either. 
I will turn 58 next week.
But there's a downside to this blessing: when time does catch up, it catches up with a vengeance. I am now about fifty percent gray. When I didn't need to color my hair, I did. Now that I need it, I've gotten lazy.

Wrinkles? least I didn't think so, until this morning. I was plucking my eyebrows and, having a bit of a problem with some of the finer hairs, resorted to my lighted tweezers, the ones with the special magnifier. Nothing says old like special tweezers with a light and a magnifier. What's next? Lifecall?

Still having a problem with those faint hairs, I put the hand mirror on the counter, leaned forward, and...was terrified by what I saw. That couldn't possibly be me! God, where did this face come from?

You're getting old, honey. Deal with it.
Is this your idea of funny?
Now that you mention it, yes.

I thought of the photo I'd taken of myself with my cellphone earlier this year, when something caused my left eyelid to swell. It was an awful photo. I looked pale and...wrinkled. I showed it to my doctor. She looked surprised. "This picture doesn't even look like you," she said.
"Oh, thank you!" She had made my day!
Until this morning....  

PS Talk about timing! Check out Old Symptoms, New Risks on WebMD....


  1. As long as you grow older gracefully. Botox is not an option! It only makes things worse.

    I started the process of hairloss early on, which was a bit of a blow; shaving it all off made me feel better.

  2. You will always remain young at heart.
    I'm sure the bandages on your nose didn't help with the mirror's counterattack. LOL

  3. I think the expression I like is that we all have to grow older, but we don't have to grow old.

  4. LOL! Thanks for making me laugh. One of my characters (age 39) used tweezers to pluck a white witch's hair from her temple. That's what I call those crackled short pieces of hair that stick straight up.


  5. I used to resent the need for reading glasses. Now I realize that removing them before gazing in the mirror is a flattering gift!

  6. I'm just waiting for the day when the wattle starts. I don't really want my neck flapping in the breeze.

  7. Well, I see a lot of seniors all day long and they tell me the same thing. Getting older isn't for sissys and it's have to have gray hair than no hair. I swear they read the same 101 book for old folks.

  8. I also had a rude awakening recently. I was describing someone as an old geezer and found out they were my age! I guess I'm an old geezer too now.

  9. Oh honey, you're only as old as you feel...and you are still vibrant and beautiful! You may have aches and pains, but you have the one thing that a lot of people don't have, and that is a sense of humour! With that, you will never grow old!

  10. I had the experience Deb mentioned. I remembering talking to a woman a few years ago and thinking that she was too old for me -- only to find out later she was a few years younger!

  11. Norma, thank heavens the mind doesn't age as quickly as the physical body. Hey, you're not an old geezer until your 90's. I love this stage of my life. Young store employees quake when they see me coming.

  12. I understand about that, hon (I have greying hair, as well-even more than I did when you and Collin had last seen me. Lol. I relate and feel for you about this of the greying hair and all). Hugs to comfort you.

  13. I've decided to age backwards but that is only to piss my wife off. That's my driving force.

  14. I like William's expression. I think I'll borrow it. If my aging memory lets me remember it, that is.
    Only a couple of months separate us, Norma - and I don't feel old most of the week.
    Gee, coming to this blog is like going to a party - so many familiar faces!


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