Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Would You Buy a Toy/Game Based on this Movie/TV Show?

Protest effects change. Sometimes. Sometimes, it just pisses people off.

If I were going to protest anything, it would be political correctness. Sorry, but it's gotten to be a real PITA (Pain In The A**). These days, no matter what you say, it's bound to offend someone. When I was growing up, we said "Merry Christmas" when we met friends on the street or interacted with salespeople while shopping for gifts. Now, we're not supposed to do that. It's been replaced by "Happy Holidays" (officially--I still say "Merry Christmas.").

It's a no-win. I never did have a good internal censor, so I do my communicating in writing, where I can edit before I hit Send--and even that doesn't always work.

Currently, a Florida mother is protesting the sale of Breaking Bad action figures at Toys R Us. I had to do a double-take on that one. Seriously? They're making toys--okay, action figures--based on Breaking Bad? Isn't that akin to adding a gag reel to the Schindler's List DVD? Some movies and TV series are made for merchandising--like Disney movies, the Despicable Me Minions, The Avengers, Guardians of the Galaxy, Star Wars, Star Trek, Batman, Superman, The X-Men, Indiana Jones and Godzilla. In Spaceballs, Mel Brooks pokes fun at the movie merchandising frenzy. When asked by Lone Star, Mog and Princess Vespa if they'll ever see him again, his character, Yogurt, replies, "Hopefully...in Spaceballs 2: The Search for More Money!"  

But...Breaking Bad? Seriously? In a toy store?

I confess, I have never seen Breaking Bad--but I know what it's about, and I just can't picture a high demand for Breaking Bad...toys. Toys R Us says, in their own defense, they're sold in the "Adult Toys" section. I didn't even know Toys R Us had an "adult" section. I always thought adult toys were those items sold at sleazy little establishments that also sell porn videos and dominatrix costumes.

But if it's a success, what next? The Sopranos hitman starter kits? Or maybe The Bold and the Beautiful musical beds game? Though the soap is set in the world of high fashion, these characters spend a lot of time naked, so there wouldn't be much of an expense for extra clothing--just a bunch of naked characters and a row of appropriately-sized doll beds. When the music stops, they all fall into bed with whoever happens to be standing next to them at the time. The odd doll left standing is instantly killed by the Psycho Babe Quinn doll.

How about a Dr. Oz Guts du Jour game? Spin the wheel and find out which internal organs the good doctor will display for you. A word of caution: don't play this one right before or immediately after mealtimes. His TV show has been the most effective appetite suppressant I've ever found.

Would anybody buy a Gravity game? Players would draw cards to determine the moves of the Sandra Bullock and George Clooney characters. Once the Clooney action figure floats too far away from Bullock's, he explodes--and the player responsible is eliminated from the play.

I'd buy a game based on The Blacklist. Each player would draw a number from Red's Blacklist. They would then be given a packet of clues to help them determine what that Blacklister's next move would be. Failure to beat the target to his or her criminal act means expulsion from the game. Get it right, and you're given one clue to the real connection between Red Reddington and Elizabeth Keen.

What do you think? What movies or TV shows do you think would make good toys or games, and which do you feel would be totally inappropriate?


  1. Psycho Babe Quinn?

    I've heard of these, and it seems pretty ludicrous. I've not seen the series, and don't really care to, but why on earth would you want to market that? It's like trying to market Angela's Ashes: The Movie Collectible Happy Dolls.

  2. I think a survivalist game would be good. And I bet there is one out there somewhere.

  3. I found myself laughing, shaking my head and agreeing with everything you said.
    One of the most stupid toys ever but I am sure there are worst. Maybe the slasher type movies. Never watched Breaking Bad. I live in a border town and see killing, drugs, the cartels, women abuse and government PC abuse every day. Why pay my hard earned money to fill hollywoods PC pockets.
    And I am so NOT PC !
    The main character is dieing (?) so he starts to sell, make drugs for his family (?) but then just likes it.... oh the woe oh the hardship.
    While the PC hollywood crowds gets awards for this ?
    Japanese son tries as much as he can to not buy any branded items for his daughter. No Barbies especially ! She saw a Disney princess dress that she wanted. The next day they found a better made non branded dance, party or princes dress whatever she makes up in her head for it to be and she loves it. It was a 1/4 the price.
    Sorry a rant back....

    cheers, parsnip

  4. Hard to believe parents will let their kids buy these things!

    I think a Sopranos starter kit might sell well! There are a lot of people who seem to be asking to be knocked off!

  5. Rant away on that one. No, I would not have bought something like that for my children and certainly won't for my grandchildren.

  6. It doesn't bother me that these figures are sold in the adult section of Toys R Us. That's where they belong. And personally, I'm okay with that.

    I'm also okay with Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays or Happy Christmas.

  7. @ William: She's the soap's resident psychopath/mother-in-law from hell.

    That's my point. Why even bother? Is there really enough of a market for such toys? Somehow, I don't see the show's audience being the types to want collectible toys.

    @ Shelly: I think you're probably right! At the rate things are going, we're going to need the real thing in the not-too-distant future.

    @ Gayle: I think some movies and TV shows lend themselves to merchandising, while others don't. I didn't sign the petition to get the stuff withdrawn, I just don't see how there could be enough of a market for it to make the network put up the money to launch it..

    I agree with your son. Better to grow up without a need for "status" possessions. My parents tried to steer clear of that kind of thing as well. I was a tomboy who wasn't into dolls. I loved horses and toy trucks, that sort of thing. I wanted a barn for my horses. My dad surprised me by building me one that was much better than the one I'd begged for in the store. I loved the one he made for me.

    @ Cheryl: You know, come to think of it, you could be right. I'd buy a Sopranos hitman starter kit!

    I've never seen either of the Purge movies, but if they had an Idiot Purge Day, I'd be so on board with that! Or maybe a Spammer Purge....

    @ Mari: I wouldn't have bought it for Collin...but then, he wouldn't have wanted it.

    @ Ivy: If I have a friend whose faith is different than my own, I'll greet them according to their beliefs. I don't have any atheist friends, but if I did, I'd just do my best Soup Nazi impersonation and say, "Hey, no presents for you!"

    1. I am a little dense here, not sure what that means, but then I also don't get all the fuss people are making over these figures, either.

    2. The Soup NazI? I take it you're not a Seinfeld fan...and here I thought I was the only one who didn't love that show.

      I did see enough episodes to know about the Soup Nazi, though--a rather irritable character whose most memorable line was, "No soup for you!"

  8. Those gaming companies should hire you with that incredible imagination of yours! Dr. Oz Guts game--that's hilarious!

  9. Haha! You made me laugh with this one Norma.. I don't watch much telly so I'm struggling to come up with some ideas for you. I do enjoy The Good Wife, so maybe a Chris Noth action man, although he's not all that active in the show :)

  10. Replies
    1. It works for his current character. Maybe not for the one he played in Sex and the City, but....


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