Tuesday, October 21, 2014
Would You Buy a Toy/Game Based on this Movie/TV Show?
Protest effects change. Sometimes. Sometimes, it just pisses people off.
If I were going to protest anything, it would be political correctness. Sorry, but it's gotten to be a real PITA (Pain In The A**). These days, no matter what you say, it's bound to offend someone. When I was growing up, we said "Merry Christmas" when we met friends on the street or interacted with salespeople while shopping for gifts. Now, we're not supposed to do that. It's been replaced by "Happy Holidays" (officially--I still say "Merry Christmas.").
It's a no-win. I never did have a good internal censor, so I do my communicating in writing, where I can edit before I hit Send--and even that doesn't always work.
Currently, a Florida mother is protesting the sale of Breaking Bad action figures at Toys R Us. I had to do a double-take on that one. Seriously? They're making toys--okay, action figures--based on Breaking Bad? Isn't that akin to adding a gag reel to the Schindler's List DVD? Some movies and TV series are made for merchandising--like Disney movies, the Despicable Me Minions, The Avengers, Guardians of the Galaxy, Star Wars, Star Trek, Batman, Superman, The X-Men, Indiana Jones and Godzilla. In Spaceballs, Mel Brooks pokes fun at the movie merchandising frenzy. When asked by Lone Star, Mog and Princess Vespa if they'll ever see him again, his character, Yogurt, replies, "Hopefully...in Spaceballs 2: The Search for More Money!"
But...Breaking Bad? Seriously? In a toy store?
I confess, I have never seen Breaking Bad--but I know what it's about, and I just can't picture a high demand for Breaking Bad...toys. Toys R Us says, in their own defense, they're sold in the "Adult Toys" section. I didn't even know Toys R Us had an "adult" section. I always thought adult toys were those items sold at sleazy little establishments that also sell porn videos and dominatrix costumes.
But if it's a success, what next? The Sopranos hitman starter kits? Or maybe The Bold and the Beautiful musical beds game? Though the soap is set in the world of high fashion, these characters spend a lot of time naked, so there wouldn't be much of an expense for extra clothing--just a bunch of naked characters and a row of appropriately-sized doll beds. When the music stops, they all fall into bed with whoever happens to be standing next to them at the time. The odd doll left standing is instantly killed by the Psycho Babe Quinn doll.
How about a Dr. Oz Guts du Jour game? Spin the wheel and find out which internal organs the good doctor will display for you. A word of caution: don't play this one right before or immediately after mealtimes. His TV show has been the most effective appetite suppressant I've ever found.
Would anybody buy a Gravity game? Players would draw cards to determine the moves of the Sandra Bullock and George Clooney characters. Once the Clooney action figure floats too far away from Bullock's, he explodes--and the player responsible is eliminated from the play.
I'd buy a game based on The Blacklist. Each player would draw a number from Red's Blacklist. They would then be given a packet of clues to help them determine what that Blacklister's next move would be. Failure to beat the target to his or her criminal act means expulsion from the game. Get it right, and you're given one clue to the real connection between Red Reddington and Elizabeth Keen.
What do you think? What movies or TV shows do you think would make good toys or games, and which do you feel would be totally inappropriate?